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Do not touch


donottouchThrough most of my life, I have lived in an era where touching is an issue.

As a youth pastor I learned that the kids could run up and hug me and call me Uncle Erwin, but I could not return the hug, hold a hand, pat a shoulder in return.

As a married man, I found the women very touchy, and yet was wise enough to make sure that this too was not reciprocated and was never in the room with a woman alone.

But it was in the workplace that I found the most difficulty.

Some women liked be touchy and there seemed to be no room for understanding, discernment or sense to see that it was too much.  Not for their sake, but for mine.

I remember one situation where a new employee, very young, had only one office job prior to coming to work with us, could not stop being touchy.  I did not want to embarrass her and went to the older women in the office for help – to this day I am not sure why they all turned me down and refused to engage.  So the best thing I could come up with was a “no touch policy.”

It turned into the most hilarious time of my life.

I must say that what I thought was helping me, actually set the office staff free.  Since I was the only male with a staff of 15, I failed to see that some of them were worried that I would be the one doing inappropriate touching and that this policy set if very clear that a handshake was more than appropriate even though they were hugging and cheek kissing each other.

The funny things you learn as you are also learning to set up appropriate boundaries in life.  My walk with Jesus at this point was rather simple – do not touch women – keeps everything else rather simple.



  1. Alex Jones says:

    Setting boundaries is vital to a healthy enviroment, “No touching” policy is awesome.

  2. lbtk says:

    That’s why people should openly discuss things that cause them discomfort — you can’t be the only one feeling that way. I am always relieved when I’m being worrisome over a subject and someone else says, “Hey, I know what you mean.” Smart guy, you are. Sandy

  3. Thanks for setting an example! 🙂


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“Behold, a virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and his name shall be called Emman′u-el” (which means, God with us)." Matthew 1:23 RSV

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